C’est la vie

esalen cliffs

I have missed writing…The many tasks necessary to ready myself to be gone for five weeks (starting tomorrow) have taken precedence.
For the next five weeks I will be at Esalen Institute in Big Sur, CA. I will be assisting two workshops, Healing From the Core, Full Body Presence and Healing the Pelvic Floor. I will also be assisting a month long Legacy Work Study Program, Leadership and Presence. I will be teaching yoga classes and co-leading the workshop, Skills to Energize Your Life. I will be lead therapist in multi-hands Cranio-Sacral sessions for the staff, as part of the Visiting Teacher Program.
It will be a rich and full five weeks. Full of experiences, full of opportunities, full of friendship, full of laughter, full of tears, full of excitement, full of healing, full of love, full of fun!
The fullness of what I am walking toward is matched in turn with the fullness of what I am leaving.  This is an opportunity to let go of that which I am want to cling to.  I am letting go of the daily connection I have with G.  I will miss him, a lot.  I am letting go of the daily experience of my two new kitties, our “children” that are our daily delight.  I know when I return they will be much more developed and I  hate to miss that time with them.  Dozer won’t have his balls when I get back….poor baby.  I am letting go of Mountain Valley Retreat and my work crew who will do things without me while I’m gone and I hate missing out on that.  I am go of my friends, students and clients all of whom I see at least weekly.  Without all of these connections and experiences my life will not be what it was.  My day to day life is amazing and letting go of it for five weeks is my practice now.  Trust and let go….oh, yes, I know that feeling…I can do this.
I feel so grateful for the opportunity to be of service at Esalen. It is a win-win situation and my heart gives a full-bodied heart “YES” to the Esalen Experience!
So without any cell service, and limited phone and internet access I will be “off-the’grid” which has it’s downside and its very HUGE upside! Once adjusted to living without technology and connection to the outside world, a shift happens that is a beautiful letting down of tension. Having the time to live in nature, not just visit it, revitalizes me deep to my bones.
Perhaps my schedule will allow me to carve out the time to write every day…that will be sweet. If not, I trust that my time will be well spent in other endeavors.
A friend sent this to me today…I am closing my page with it:
“Often the feeling of loneliness results not from a lack of people to entertain us but from the absence of an adult self to nurture our inner child who feels abandoned in some way. (Loneliness is also an appropriate way to feel as we make transitions, take a stand, become more spiritually awake, or find ourselves.) We may take loneliness literally and look for company in all the wrong places. … The words of … Natalie Goldberg … ‘Use loneliness. Its ache creates urgency to reconnect with the world. Take that aching and use it to propel you deeper into your need for expression–to speak, to say who you are.’ ”

–David Richo’s “How to be an Adult in Relationships”

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